Gossip is therapeutic. I am a grownass woman and I can attest to this fact!
Talking about your grievances against someone to a neutral sympathetic ear makes you feel instantly better.
We justify it by saying we are only confiding in a friend who understands; or airing our views to one who wouldn’t blow it out of proportion. We shy away from the word back-biting seeing it as an unkind synonym.
‘I am not a confrontational person’, we say.
‘I am passive aggressive’, we seek to justify.
‘He/She would never accept the fault was theirs’, we argue.
‘It may lead to a big fight and an end to a friendship you still need’, we silently agitate.
So we say nothing. We talk about our grievances to all and sundry except the aggressor; not realizing that we are creating a monster. A person who feels they do no wrong and goes through life unchecked.
We unknowingly groom a self-righteous fiend and then one day it goes too far and you blow the lid off your pent up emotions and say more than you should about every damn issue that has ever bothered you and the other person is taken aback believing his small misdemeanor led to a torrential outpouring of negative emotion. We overreact like a pressure cooker in its prime. Many friendships do not survive that, even well-meaning ones.
So is gossip really therapeutic? Maybe in the short run but facing your issues with the one you call friend is an investment in your future.
You know you deserve better so if there’s someone out there who you call a friend, who has done things to you that make you choke up with unspoken emotion every time you think of them, man up and tell that person exactly how you feel. Cut out the insults and assumptions and say it as you see and feel it. It won’t be pretty but your friendship will come out stronger and if you have to kiss the friendship goodbye then consider it self-preservation. Nobody is indispensable!
Rise above gossip. Don’t say it to them till you have said it to him/her. #hardbutworthatry
Matthew 18:15 KJV;
‘Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother.’
I wish for you friends that stick closer than brothers…
Have a great day Chutzpah fam,