RSS

Category Archives: Inspirational

Nuggets for 2017 (1)

Happy new year people! We made it to yet another year and that’s reason enough to celebrate and of course to reflect and plan. 

I stumbled across 10 wise instructions for the new year and I want to discuss each with you for the next couple of days, from my perspective.

Here’s Numero uno!

Never embark on a project without prayer. Regardless of how prepared, professional or persistent you are, you NEED God.

There can’t be any form of planning without prayer. The belief in a higher power is the only form of security one can actually lay claims to in this time of economic and financial insecurity. 

Being prepared is not a guarantee! 

How many times have we been prepared for an event and then got thrown a curve ball? 

Being professional is not a sure banker!

Whether you are a professional or you act in a professional manner makes little difference when favors are to be dispensed. 

So many people have gotten jobs they were ill- qualified for and got passed over for positions that they were even over- qualified for. 

Being persistent could be misguided!

Persistence pays but not when you are barking up the wrong tree. For so many, persistence easily gives way to desperation and depression.

Proverbs sums it all up nicely!

So people let’s not put the cart before the horse in 2017! 

Have a lovely day Chutzpah fam,

Xoxo

Photo credits: Google images

 
2 Comments

Posted by on January 3, 2017 in #TeamJesus

 

Tags: , , ,

16 Reasons to Be thankful for 2016 (despite the bloopers)

It’s so easy to look back on 2016 and call it your worst year yet. We got neck deep into an economic recession, pay checks got pay cuts while market prices soared and a bunch of people lost a lot to ponzi schemes…I’m sure far worse things happened (disease, death, heartbreak, betrayal etc) but instead of focusing on the nasty, I choose to be grateful for 2016 and usher in 2017 with a heart of gratitude. So here are 16 things to be grateful for as we draw the curtains on 2016!

1. You are alive

A lovely woman I know, lost her life a couple of weeks ago and just three months to her wedding. She was killed by a disgruntled steward (may her gentle soul RIP) :-(. So many have died this year. There are mass killings happening in Kaduna, we all should be grateful for life, I know I am.

2. You are healthy

I work with HIV patients at the teaching hospital and every day I interact with dozens of very sick people. It just makes you appreciate good health.

3. You have a job

So many people got laid off this year, so many others couldn’t find employment. If you have a job, no matter how crappy you think it is, you need to be thankful!

4. You traveled from point A to B without getting robbed, kidnapped or maimed.

We all did some form of traveling this year and despite the news we heard about car accidents, plane crashes, kidnaps and robberies we arrived our destinations safe and sound every time.

5. Despite the economy, we had some spare change for data, turn ups and junk food.

It might not seem like a lot but more than half of Nigeria’s population live on less than a dollar a day so by many standards you are considered upper class.

6. You didn’t pay lastma or FRSC exorbitant sums of money this year.

It’s something to be thankful for, if you doubt it just ask someone who got caught!

7. You had light albeit interrupted

Some people did not have power supply for the 12months in 2016 and some of them live in Lekki!

8. You got paid a salary even if it was delayed or incomplete

So many Nigerians in both the public and private sector didn’t get paid their salaries for months on end and are not even sure if or when the arrears will be paid.

9. You didn’t break up with your significant other this year

So many relationships, marriages, partnerships and friendships went awry this year. If yours is still intact and thriving you had better be thankful.

10. You didn’t invest all you had in a ponzi scheme

Yes you may have lost a big chunk of your savings but aren’t you glad you didn’t invest your house rent, school fees or business capital into the ponzi scheme? Be thankful that you didn’t lose more than you did.

11. You didn’t break the internet

So many people broke the internet this year and 97% of them did so for the wrong reasons so isn’t it enough to be thankful that your nude pic didn’t leak online, you weren’t arrested for theft or fraud and naijagistlive had no tea on you this year? 

12. You met your deadlines

Think about all the crazy deadlines you had this year especially the ones that seemed virtually impossible to achieve but they are now in the past and they didn’t break you so that’s another reason to be thankful. 

13. You didn’t bury a loved one 

So many people had their heart’s broken this year because they had to bury a father, brother, mother, sister, grandparent,  spouse, relative, friend or significant other. If you were spared such misery you have to be thankful.

14. Even with the dollar skyrocketing, you still paid your bills

You watched the dollar fly way beyond your reach but it didn’t stop you from paying your bills, going on trips and shopping online so that’s another reason to be thankful.

15. You got some of the things you wished and prayed for in 2016

Yes I know all your needs weren’t met but some were and that’s enough reason to be thankful because at the start of 2016 you had zero guarantees that you’d get some of those things but you did!

16. You have hope

Despite the economic recession, despite the hardship and tribulations you still have hope and that’s a reason to be thankful because there are some who are hopeless and despondent and they are the most miserable of all.

So you see 2016 wasn’t as bad as you thought it was…2017 will be an awesome year for us all in Jesus name…Amen

Counting down to the new year…

I moved my blog back to WordPress for several reasons that I won’t bore you with (just in case you were wondering about the URL change). I really want to blog more in 2017 so fingers crossed (won’t make any promises tonight). Have a great evening chutzpah FAM and thanks for not giving up on me…

Xoxo

:*

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on December 29, 2016 in Inspirational

 

Tags: , , ,

The Wiser

Someone once told me that the worst sort of misfortune is to fail to learn from your own experience after failing to learn from the experiences of others leading to an infinite cycle of mistakes because you refused to learn. Sounds awful but you’d be amazed how common it is. 
If you have any doubts, look around you; the young girl who seems so well put together but keeps picking the Yoruba demons, married men on the prowl, serial monogamists, violent, insecure or yahoo boys as mates. Her whole dating history can be summed up into the caption for the movie ‘Edge of tomorrow’: Live.Die.Repeat.

Or how about the guy who jumps from one bad decision to another, fueled by the incessant ill- advice of no good friends or petty jealousy and rivalry or ego trips that turn up empty. First it was the pyramid scheme that would give him 1million from 1 thousand if only he recruited 9 other people (seemed easy enough) and then the forex deals that went sour and then the real estate deals that weren’t pure. Losing more money than he earns gotta be tough but is he the wiser?

Before you start judging, look inward. We all have that one thing that has become our live.die.repeat.

LIVE

Like any addiction we feel alive when we embark on a new misadventure. We believe that this time it will be different; that this situation is somehow different from the last or we are somehow more justified or have learned a bit more to be able to handle it this time.

And yet we…

DIE

Every single time we get crushed, the destructive pathway hurts a little more. The nightmarish déjà vu staring you in the face. They say only a mad man does the same thing the exact same way every effing time but expects a different result. So why does your anger seem to always get you into messed up situations? Why do your decisions lead to destruction? Why do you lose your cool? Why do you still chook head when you know how the story ends? The failed relationship, the lost finances, the broken friendships, the anarchy, the personal failures…

You know you die but like a moth to a flame you just can’t resist so you…

REPEAT

And then you swear you have learned your lesson till the next time the exact scenario plays out and then you fall on your face claiming that to err is human and it’s the way you were created and no one’s perfect and blah blah blah justifying your actions instead of making a conscious effort to learn from them and ditch the destructive behavior for good.

I am guilty, you probably are too!

Faults, addictions, character flaws and weaknesses should not get the better of you! Be the wiser, it is possible, regardless of how tempting delving in is. Remember that sometimes when you die, you really die. Choose to live!

Have a great day,

Xoxo

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on September 20, 2016 in Inspirational

 

Tags: , ,

Ten Crazy Truths About Going To School!

Ten Crazy Truths About Going To School!

maxresdefault

Going to school is the law! Well even if it isn’t no right thinking parent would allow you skip school entirely but is school really doing for us what it’s meant to? Are we in actual fact better than those who only know how to read and write and have no other form of organized learning? So many great men and women didn’t go to school and many more dropped out but they seem to have higher qualifications in the school of life than many so called educated people.

Here are 10 crazy truths about school!

1) You learn conformity
Conformity is defined as compliance with standards, rules, or laws or behaviour in accordance with socially accepted conventions. Conformity means you never ask questions, not the questions that are actually important. Conformity means not questioning the system even if it’s unjust and keeping your opinions and future actions in la la land in favor of doing absolutely nothing while offering watery smiles and profuse lip service to the very system that kicks against you! That is conformity!

2) You forget how to think outside the box
You do as you’re told or as others have done before you. You never stop to think for one minute how your life would be if you didn’t do what was expected but instead did that which made your heart glad. We become deathly afraid of the unknown, preferring to die in captivity than entertain a life beyond our confines! It sucks I tell you!

3) You start to believe that more degrees will get you the money and respect you crave
The Secondary school leaving certificate became the bachelor’s degree and then the master’s degree and now you are considering a doctoral degree not because you love school oh but simply because of the hundred thousand Naira difference in salary (before tax) the higher you go academically. Money that one young boy will blow in one night at a club! No wonder with each new degree attained the emptiness inside seems to grow, you are not living life my friend, you are merely existing!

4) You realise too late that those with the real money and power didn’t go to school
Yep, the reality hits you just after you bag your first certificate and then see a Nigerian musician who didn’t go to school spraying your future salary on a babe in the club! If you have doubts check out this link: Billionaires who didn’t go to school

5) They don’t tell you that half of the s*it you learn in school is not going to help you in the real world
I still can’t understand how dy,dx features in my every day life as a medical doctor. Someone once said it taught me analytical skills, heck I probably learned more analytical skills from watching Inception!

6) You are programmed to do what everyone else does as sheep do!
If the crowd is running in one direction, you just run with them without asking why. School makes you feel like the majority has to always be right, like minorities don’t matter and being popular is more important than revelling in your uniqueness. Hasn’t it occured to anyone yet that the nerds in school become the future successful ones and the popular ones are stuck with mediocrity when they get into the real world? Of course it has but it usually occurs to us after we are done with school! Check out this behaviour that aptly describes how sheepy we can be! Click here: Human experiment.

7) Your self esteem and abilities are reprogrammed by bullies and disgruntled teachers
It doesn’t matter if you come from a loving home, if you do not possess strength of character or perhaps an iron fist, a sharp tongue or bodily enhancements, then you are fed to the wolves as soon as you make your school debut! And the more you get maltreated by teachers and students alike, the darker and more insecure you become even if you can fake otherwise. School thrives on the fear of the weak and the prey are left scarred for decades after.

8) You spend all your time learning about other people’s inventions instead of creating your own
Your creative abilities are harnessed and then buried forever! Harnessed in preschool with endless drawings and compositions and Plasticine and perhaps the occasional science project but eventually buried in favour of learning about the inventions of men who instead of serving as pace setters and role models have unfortunately become mere fictional characters whose formulae you must memorise to pass Physics class!

9) You look down on the subjects that could actually make you rich- French, Arts, Music, Food and nutrition and Agricultural science and instead focus on the ones that would only get you into more school
And now you are 32 and can only speak English and Yoruba because you never took French seriously and your company can’t send you to work abroad! #missedopportunities.
Imagine if you had taken agricultural science seriously? The tomato crisis could have been your big boom!

10)You learn too late that knowledge really isn’t power
Nope, money is power and influence is power and influence only comes with money so again money is power. Respect is the distant cousin of influence and being respected is entirely subjective. People will respect a well read man but when push turns to shove they will cast him aside for the man with the money. That’s the reality in which we live!

School doesn’t teach you life skills or tech skills, check out this video: Don’t stay in school

…But we have to go to school or have already gone to school just because we don’t wanna be like the proverbial old man who cries tears of regret because he wishes he had stayed in school or maybe because we actually like school (some great memories made there) but school doesn’t bring success, fulfilment or happiness that’s entirely up to you! You need to realise it’s a flawed system and cast off all restraints. You need to maximise your potential and do what makes you happy and what you know you are awesome at, regardless of what society thinks of it! MAKE SCHOOL WORK FOR YOU, it’s supposed to give you an advantage so USE IT!

Stay in school but don’t let school brainwash you into becoming a lesser version of yourself!

 
10 Comments

Posted by on September 1, 2016 in Inspirational

 

Tags: , , , , , ,

My new gig and all the other stuff I need to tell you!

Hey Chutzpah fam,

I am sorry.
There are not enough words to excuse my absence.
I am so sorry for leaving you guys hanging for almost 3 months. Gosh that really is a long time!

I would like to thank Michelle, Sir OJ and Adesuwa for being my top commenters for the year 2015! You guys make blogging worthwhile, love you! I would also love to thank everyone who took out time to read, share and comment on my posts all year round. God bless you all and may the last hours of 2015 bring you a dumbfounding miracle!

Great news, I got a job writing for Cosmopolitan magazine. I grew up reading cosmos and it’s amazing that now I get to write the same type of articles that stole my heart and made me the woman I am today! Yayyy! I have already written a bunch of posts for them using my real name Anita Benson. So here’s part of the reason why I haven’t been blogging so often and I do promise in the new year to strike a balance because I’d hate to disappoint you guys more than I already have.

Then there’s the not so great news. My older posts are all over the internet shamelessly plagiarised by wannabe bloggers. I think it’s despicable for someone to claim my intellectual property as theirs but I really don’t know what to do about it! Any ideas people?

Then there’s the petrol wahala! Some sanity seems to have returned to Lagos with fewer queues and filling stations selling at 87 naira but in Benin city, the queues are still long and the evil filling stations sell fuel at 120-135 naira per liter. Does anyone know who is supposed to be in charge? Oshiomole doesn’t seem to care at all! #Buharitakenote

And then I’d like to say a huge congrats to my sister and her beau who just tied the knot. God’s blessings darlings! And to all my friends who recently had babies (it’s raining babies this season). May joy never cease in your lives.

And my friends, the ones who made 2015 beautiful… Ruky Orife, Tolu Sowande, Funsho Orepitan, Isoken Ulikhinfo, Oke Onuwaje, Uche Agboje, Ufoma Obademi, Wura Olusanya, Dunni Ajayeoba, Chioma Agokei, Ame Nehikhare etc. Love you guys. God bless you for loving me flaws and all.

So barely 36 hours left till 2016 and here are seven things I want you to carry with you into the new year!
1) You do not have space in your life for toxic people. Any one who doesn’t uplift, encourage, improve or comfort you should have no place in your life in the new year. Zero tolerance for BS! Only allow positive people into your life so start spring cleaning your social circles, phone book, Whatsapp, BBM and social media from today!
2) There is absolutely nothing you cannot do as long as you put your mind to it. Nobody remembers how many times you failed at it once you finally do succeed so let your mantra be ‘I can and I will’!!!
3) Start and end your day with God! It’s the only way to stay victorious, happy and at peace!
4) Make room for family. Call your parents, siblings, relatives. Let them know how much you care. You won’t always have them with you, ask those who unexpectedly lost their loved ones. There will never be enough time, you need to create time!
5) Save and invest! Those who will be poor in the new year will be those who eat everything that comes into their hands. Set something aside for later regardless of how tight things may seem. You’ll be grateful you did!
6) Help the poor. Find someone that you can make smile at least once a month either with cash or kind. The bible says those who help the poor lend to God and you know lending to God is the best investment ever.
7) Don’t stop believing. You may not have achieved a whole lot of your goals for 2015 or even the year before and your prayer requests may seem unanswered but don’t lose hope, don’t stop believing. He has a plan for you and His timing is perfect. Be steadfast and patient and you’ll be glad you waited for His time.

HAPPY NEW YEAR MY DARLINGS!!!
MAY IT BE YOUR BEST YEAR YET!
HUGS AND KISSES!

 
3 Comments

Posted by on December 30, 2015 in Inspirational

 

Tags: , , , , ,

The Race

Are you feeling discouraged because your life isn’t going according to plan?

Are you feeling down because everyone around you seems to be moving forward and you feel stuck in the mud?

That was me some days ago and this is what dropped into my heart as the car sped down the highway back to Benin city and it dragged me right out of the funk…

Everyone has their time to shine…
Their purpose, their trials…
Their wins and their losses…

Sometimes someone may seem to be running the same race as you are but don’t make them your focus…

See it as two cars momentarily side by side as they speed on a highway, both going to different destinations, either of them will make one or more stops before they get there or even a detour…

Your journey is not determined by the journey of the car closest to you on the highway regardless of your comparative speed…

Be rest assured that you will get to your destination…

It doesn’t matter if others get there first…

It doesn’t matter if you seem last on the queue…

There’s a beautiful story unraveling that’s all about you…

You are not forgotten…

And you will be celebrated…

Hope this gets you out of a funk too. Sometimes we need to encourage ourselves. It can only get better…

Xoxoxo

 
2 Comments

Posted by on September 30, 2015 in Inspirational

 

Tags: , , , ,

10 things you need to do before you get married

This is the ultimate bucket list. Daring, fun, unforgettable! Your perfect prelude to kicking the singles bucket!!!

Marriage isn’t the end of all things fun- you spend more of your life married than you do single so why eliminate fun from the equation? But that being said, there are some things you probably shouldn’t do after you are married. They should be hidden in a box labeled fantastic memories for your peeking and reminiscing pleasure but of course that can’t happen if you left them in the secret fantasies box ay?
So here’s Chutzpah’s single bucket list:

1.  Go on a spontaneous adventure. The key words being spontaneity and adventure! A lot of us live well thought out and planned existences, we are where we are supposed to be when we are supposed to be there. While living an ordered existence may make life drama free and progressive, you need to one day look back on your life and chuckle about that one (or more) spontaneous adventure. Mine was during NYSC when two of my girlfriends and I decided to go to Idanre hills out of the blues. Read it here —> Mountain climbing

  1. Live alone: There is no feeling as sublime as living by your own rules, in your own filth and at your own pace without input from another person even if it’s only for a little while. If it’s not already on your bucket list please put it there. It’s the best emancipation you could ever have and you learn about being independent and your own person in ways you never dreamed of. I know most families traditionally want their daughter to marry from their house but there are ways around this. NYSC, masters (in another town or country), a cross-country job, an internship or a volunteer job just remember to move back home a couple of months before you say ‘I do’. There’s a certain mushiness and bond that pervades your family house when you are planning a wedding together plus the fights and unwarranted advice are priceless.

  2. Face at least one of your fears: One day you are gonna have a kid who might be afraid of something and you’d need to give him a talk on facing your fears but if all you’ve ever done is run from them then how brave would you expect your offspring to be? I grew up sheltered and not particularly brave, I was the goody two shoes who always played it safe but I have long since earned my ‘Chutzpah’ badge! From riding a bike without screaming for dear life—-> Okadas a one way trip to hell to conquering my phobia for driving- now drive interstate like a pro or allowing my friend Ame to convince me to go on those death-defying rides at the park! If you haven’t faced at least one fear you haven’t started living!

  3. Love your body- what’s the bucket list challenge here you may be wondering? Well if you have never worn a bikini at the pool or a bodycon dress without strapping yourself into a corset or spandex first then you can’t cross this off your list yet! No matter how many flaws you think you have now, you will look back in a couple of years and actually wish you had the body you have now. So rock it babe! Be proud of who you are. Statistics have shown that men are more attracted to confidence than to perfection. Don’t become that woman who can’t have a makeup free day or who is totally lost without a bum-pad, padded boobs and a waist cincher. Have some self-love bae, don’t be that wife who would only have sex with the lights off!!! No one can love you unless you love yourself. And if you feel gaining or losing a few pounds will do the trick, then do it now. There’s no time like the present.

  4. Fall in love, Hollywood style: You know the script, the one that makes you feel so good after watching the movie. The one that has the heroine fall for a man she thought was totally wrong for her or totally out of her league. He doesn’t have to be the one but nothing says I totally enjoyed the life of my head like having those kinda memories and I am talking the whole works here- butterflies, heady kisses, late night rendezvous, midnight calls, big fights and even better makeups. The guy who becomes your greatest love story. Every grandma has a story like that and her face lights up as she tells it and then softens when she says and then I met your grandpa… #epic

  5. Do your own thing—> achieve something just for you! Don’t let all your accomplishments in life be from the day you became Mrs Somebody! Before you get married, finish up your degree, achieve a career milestone or do something on that secret list you have. Something awesome that you can always feel good about…Before your father met me, I had started my own business…

  6. Travel somewhere with your girlfriends or sisters. Somewhere far, somewhere new and somewhere exciting. It could be a road trip or you could fly there but make sure you are seated together. The memories, the conversations, the adventure, the summer flings and the pictures will last a lifetime plus it’s not a guarantee that you’d have the opportunity to make such a trip after you get married.

  7. Treat yourself: Splurge on yourself without apology. So many people are cautious about their spending habits and never get to just buy that one unnecessary thing that would make their life perfect LOL. You need to indulge at least once before you get married because once you are married finances are a joint discussion and you might not have the chance to treat yourself without apology. Life is too short to never have thoroughly enjoyed yourself even for a minute without worrying about the bills or the deficit the expense will create.

  8. Tell that one truth: Do not get married if you never got the chance to tell your crush or your ‘best friend’ how you really feel about him. Don’t get married with baggage. Set yourself free. Tell that one truth, that truth you swore you’d be buried with because it was too embarrassing to share. You’d be surprised at the outcome and even if your crush doesn’t admit to have secretly been loving you back all this time at least you can proudly strike it off your bucket list and laugh about it later.

  9. Get to know yourself—> do not wait for marriage to define you or to be your sole identity. It irks me when I see married women who would literally cease to exist if they stopped being Mrs Somebody. That shouldn’t be. You were a person before you met your husband and became his wife and mother of his children! Get to know yourself. Go on a self-discovery trip if you must. Know what you like and what you don’t like, what you can compromise on and what you absolutely can’t, what your strengths are and where your limits lie. Know your personality type, your temperament and your weaknesses! You can absolutely not get married till you know exactly who you are and creating
    opportunities of self discovery is entirely up to you and your awesome bucket list!

So ladies instead of sitting around waiting for Mr Right to sweep you off your feet, spend the time slaying this single bucket list. Get yourself some CHUTZPAH! And you’ll be surprised and astounded by the
new, more confident you. Self-love is key baybay!

Mwaaaah!

 
Leave a comment

Posted by on July 2, 2015 in Inspirational

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,