A not so recent poll showed that the average person is willing to sacrifice 6 months’ salary to find true love!
To some, this may be regarded as a bad business investment, not with the divorce rate sky rocketing and broken love being as common as a 20 naira note. Nowadays people wonder if this thing called love is worth sticking their necks out for.
What is love anyway? According to my friend D, if it isn’t ‘agape’ love (the kind taught in the bible; meaning you could be Jack in the titanic for that person), then all na wash! Cos according to him, if it ain’t that kinda love, then it’s just prada-coated lust! I was watching Tinsel last night and was so mad at Soji for going to jail for a crime he didn’t commit because of his love for some chick who’d cheated and dumped him times without number. Some weeks back, I had been itching to slap someone as Fred Ade-Williams’ wife allowed her husband’s ex into their home because he had amnesia and his only memories were not of her but of a former love. I didn’t pity her one bit when she found out they had started sleeping together! Obviously, I could never be Jack in the Titanic!
My African sensibilities forbid that I love blindly but is that enough to say all I’ve ever felt has been infatuation and lust? Is that enough to say I am incapable of knowing what true love is? Abeggy joor, course not! I have loved; Deeply, truly and sacrificially, I have had my heart broken and had it mended again. Yes this thing called love is more potent than we can imagine. But is love enough?
After things with boyfriend number two went awry because of religious differences, I learnt an important lesson. Love is like salt in soup. Without salt, the soup is tasteless, boring, almost inedible (almost I said) but yet who can eat salt alone? So again I ask, ‘Is love enough?’
Today all over the world sincere and not so sincere people proclaimed undying love for 24 hours to that special person. But was the love proclaimed enough to keep them together till next year’s valentine’s day or even till the end of the week? For many the answer is No!
If anyone claims to understand this thing called love, then the person claims to be the wisest of all. Love is damn hard to figure. Worse than a jigsaw puzzle because sometimes the pieces just don’t fit right. Love defies logic, it baffles common sense. As if that’s not enough trouble, it springs up in the most unlikely places and loves to evade those who earnestly seek it. Love… The beginning and end of wahala. It’s such a beautiful emotion yet people have acted foolishly and sometimes even committed hurtful, heinous crimes all in the name of love. But powerful as it is, is love enough?
Can love keep a couple together during a storm? Can love replace the emptiness of a bank account? Can love take away the pain of death? Can love mend a heart betrayed by infidelity? Or more cliché, can love put food on the table? Love can do a whole lot of things but there are some things it cannot do… Love cannot take the place of friendship, honesty, maturity, trust and fidelity between two people. Love heals but love destroys.
As we enjoy the spirit of the moment, let’s pause and evaluate this thing called love. It’s worthy of celebration but one must remember that it cannot stand alone. Fortifying it takes more effort than the acceptance of jobless butterflies floating around in your unsuspecting tummy! Like a rose garden love should be tenderly pruned and watered and planted in a soil rich with honesty and fertile with trust for it to blossom. It doesn’t matter if the soil be clay, humus or sandy for we were all made differently and have different priorities. Don’t wait till next year to check on your garden, it needs attention everyday…
“Love is sustained by action, it is a pattern of devotion in things we do for each other everyday…” (Nicholas Sparks)
Happy Valentine’s day Chutzpah fam!