Don’t Let Go!

21 Jul

photo courtesy

I’m screaming so loud, screaming till my voice is hoarse, screaming till my ears hurt and my eyes water. I’m screaming yet no one hears me. I’m screaming yet no one understands. Help me I beg of you. Help me before I hurt myself. Help me because I’m drowning, help me because I can no longer cope, help me because I’m losing the battle, help me because I’m not strong enough. Don’t be fooled by my smile, look into my eyes. Don’t just say hi and walk by, sit with me for a while. Give me your strength, just a bit of your courage and maybe I’ll have the will to keep on, maybe a bit of magic can have my spirits restored. I’ve sunk into grave darkness, the world has grown silent, all I see are people too busy to stop for a moment, my screams drowned by the bustle of the season. I need calm so I reach for the bottle of valium…a tablet too many is all it takes, I hear the whisper over and over again and then I swallow………..*Blackness………….Curtain falls!

I’m sitting in a car crawling in Lagos traffic and I look at the faces of my girlfriends as they laugh away and despite their excited chatter, a somber mood settles…I wonder if any of them is depressed, I wonder if any of them is gonna wake up one morning and take her life. I love my friends dearly and I know this all sounds a bit bizarre but I lost someone recently, unconfirmed reports say it was a suicide. We went to school together and tho’ we weren’t close, I can imagine the pain her family and friends are going through. They will probably never outlive the shock.
Beyond the shores of Nigeria, people get therapy for depression, they get professional counselling before and after a doctor breaks bad news. They form support groups to offer strength and a source of hope to strangers needing them. But here we think we have immunity, we believe in the power of love and the strength of the bonds connecting us to family and friends. We believe in our sense of personal strength and our ability to fight back when the world tosses its bleakest weapons in our path. We believe in the power of prayer. But only one who has sunk to the depths of depression knows that sometimes you are too weak to pray, too tired to even whisper those words and as hope slips away, for some, it takes with it their desire to live…

How many times have we been too busy doing our own thing to reach out and be a friend? How many times have we wondered why someone looked so sad and withdrawn but never bothered enough to ask why? How many times have we heard of the calamity that befell a friend when we should have been with them right through it, holding their hands every step of the way? How many times have you confessed in an unguarded moment how you seem to have lots of friends but in a time of need you have none? How many times have we turned to far away family for help rather than a friend close by because they seemed like the only ones we could actually rely on? How many times have we stayed away from a friend who needed us, unwilling to have them dampen our mood and justifying our actions by saying we wouldn’t be able to help much anyway? There is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother so the Bible says, yet we are hard-pressed to find friends like that. Our ineptness at picking friendships can only be rivaled by our knack for picking unsuitable partners in a relationship. Why would we invest time, money and love nurturing a friendship if in an hour of need, the bank claimed bankruptcy leaving us alone and afraid?

Remember the Hollywood stars who died lonely deaths because though they were loved by many, they still felt lonely and alone. Could it be because they never let anyone get close enough or because those who were close enough were too busy looking out for themselves to look out for someone else?
There’s a girl dead today because she felt like she couldn’t go on. There’s a man somewhere who looks so ambitious and well put together from the outside but inside sobs uncontrollably, desperately trying to stay strong while hoping that someone, anyone will see his facade crumbling away and save him before it’s too late…Many are losing this fight.

I look at my beautiful, confident, energetic friends and make a vow to be a better friend, to check up on them more frequently than I’ve done and to say a prayer for them every once in a while. I want to go from being a good friend to being a great friend…

“A good friend is one who bails you out of jail, but a great friend is the one sitting right by you in the cell…” 🙂

Every individual is different and every person has an elastic limit. Knowing when to wave a red flag and ask for help is crucial in this game of survival. We can’t always be sure of what life will throw at us but always remember that as long as there’s life, there’s hope. A problem shared is half-solved! May the souls of those who died alone in their struggle find mercy and rest in the life after. Amen.
Have a lovely day peeps…xoxoxo


Posted by on July 21, 2011 in Hall of Fame, Inspirational


Tags: , , , , ,

16 responses to “Don’t Let Go!

  1. babaneyo

    July 21, 2011 at 8:40 am

    This is too deep. I’m almost crying where I am. I need to become a great friend to those that I claim matter to me no matter how difficult that will be… *sigh* Nice post

  2. christine

    July 21, 2011 at 8:57 am

    Its really thought provoking,i think this should be a wake up call to all of us, we need to start caring more about people. A simple call,text msg ,ping, visit or prayer could make all the difference…niceee post!

  3. Ngeez

    July 21, 2011 at 10:05 am

    spot on!!! may all dos who have gone his way in such manner through out all the ages through the mercy of God rest in peace!!

  4. parvathynidhin

    July 21, 2011 at 10:08 am

    Beautiful thought!!!!
    But have you thought about how many people around you would do that for you?? From what I’ve experienced… I dont think many… The world around is too fast.. too hectic and too self oriented.. There are only very VERY few people in this world who has thoughts of compassion and care.. Congrats to you for being one of them… And I hope You’l have the care and concern you well deserve from your friends at times of need… because I for one was lonely.. years back.. when i was crying for help…

  5. emjay

    July 21, 2011 at 10:20 am

    I heard the story too, saw her beautiful pic and my heart bled for her.i always try my best to listen to pple speak and assure you of my support when you decide to talk for those who refuse.i pray that God will use me to bring succour to people. R.I.P MOTUNRAYO!

  6. Femi Mohammed

    July 21, 2011 at 11:44 am

    Hmmmmmmmm. Wow! I guess we all need reminders like this from time to time. Its amazing how much we afford to take for granted. Very inspiring write up. Keep being the best.

  7. funmi

    July 21, 2011 at 2:39 pm

    This was a really nice piece, will definitely need to pay attention more to my friends

  8. doll

    July 21, 2011 at 5:50 pm

    well said

  9. abi mohammed

    July 21, 2011 at 9:29 pm

    Ur best post yet! May her soul rest in perfect peace!

  10. Ema

    July 21, 2011 at 10:25 pm

    I can actually relate with your words…really had a rough time this past weeks, and i felt all alone, my friends were to busy to talk with and there was no one i felt would really want to listen…But God saw me out of it and I am much better.
    We really should take time to notice our friends and hold their hands through whatever they are going through….It makes it a lot easier and more bearable.

  11. adebola mohammed

    July 21, 2011 at 10:39 pm

    It’s pity realising just how much unaltruistic we are when all along we believe we are the most selfless. Most times our care does not exceed the facade inspite of its genuineness. We need to do more, much better than we are doing right now. Thank you for this, its a shuffle to our conscience.
    Now, talking about doing more, I think you really need to start doing more. Honestly, I never heard of you prior to your clear-up of the blog awards but in just a week, am tilting towards becoming a dedicated fan. And I dare say, am not the only one.
    Your blog’s got it all, every attribute for its success is resident. However, you have to do more with consistency. Please, ensure ur posts are more often, not many of us can wait for 5 days or more to read new posts.
    Remember, with more power, comes greater responsibility. Na u find trouble go win everything naa.

  12. stelzz

    July 22, 2011 at 12:32 am

    true talk

  13. Butterd

    July 22, 2011 at 6:22 am

    Beautiful piece. I learnt from anoda angle 2day readin dis. We all cud be beta people.

  14. nshina

    July 22, 2011 at 11:41 pm

    You’re totally on point Neetah..just like Ema,I’ve been dealing with a lot of stuff on my own lately and my girls aren’t there for me..I have tried several times to reach out to them,not even about my problems but to find out what’s happening in their lives..everyone’s busy these days.I hope that we don’t look back sometime in the future and have regrets.Well,I’m glad that there’s a God that will never leave me nor forsake me..cliché right?..but we can’t expect too much from people or we’re setting ourselves up for disappointment.A word of advice..God de and He’s sufficient for us all.

  15. Esfanna

    July 24, 2011 at 9:54 pm

    Amen dear! Amen to ur prayers.. It baffles me too. I’m always surrounded by people, even when I sleep, i have people around me but I feel soo alone atimes. I wallow in problems all alone. And I can’t pinpoint why this is.

  16. keiskwerd

    July 26, 2011 at 7:12 am

    Time and time again, I still find myself returning to this article………
    ……..Don’t let go


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